Spank the Monkey Awards Q&A

By popular demand our reunion events including Friday at Arrowhead, Saturday evening at Sevilla, and Sunday’s Woodsie will prouldly feature the class of 1972 “2002 Spank the Monkey Award” presentations.


2002 Spank the Monkey Awards!
– Frequently Asked Questions –


Q. Why in the world the “Spank the Monkey Award?”

A. Since nobody in the class of 1972 had a clue as to what sort of awards are traditionally handed out at high school reunions, we have taken the exact reverse approach with the “2002 Spank the Monkey” awards. This monkey thing has taken on a life of its own and has morphed into a parody and complete spoof of all other traditional reunion awards.

Q. Yeah, but why “Spank the Monkey?”

A. One of the goals regarding the committee’s chosen nontraditional reunion venues is to make this reunion really different, memorable, and a lot of fun. Since the “Monkey” lives as pure entertainment, we’d say the “Monkey” fits the bill.

Q. Well OK… But, I still don’t get how it works?

A. Envision it: Everybody gets a ballot when they sign in at each reunion event. All the monkey award categories are listed. The voting is write-in only. The idea is for folks to mingle with the purpose of trying to find somebody to vote for that even remotely fits the categories. Can you imagine the opening lines? Oh man! (Just imagine the people watching potential here!)

Q. Yeah, but I’m shy in social situations. How could I possibly ask someone if they deserve the “Least Hairy Monkey” Award?

A. After 30 years, we have a situation here where most of us can’t even remember the classmates we actually knew! What could possibly serve as a better icebreaker and conversation piece than write-in ballots with all those bizarre “Monkey” categories?

Q. Are we back to clique awards just like back in school?

A. Are you serious? The “Spank the Monkey” awards of honor and distinction are not meant to hurt anyone or meant to focus on any particular clique. Frankly, after 30 years the playing field is finally level. We are all adults here. Acne has been replaced by wrinkles, the jocks have bad knees, the hippies are the investment bankers, and ‘most likely to succeed’ is living in a backwoods cabin in Montana. Cliques? What cliques? Folks is folks!

Q. Sure… So, just how do you determine the winners?

A. This is the most democratic type of voting anyone could possibly dream of. There are no nominations, it ain’t student council, no “academy” rigging the votes, and the winners don’t even necessarily have to do anything in particular to win! That’s democracy in action!

An exception to the write-in voting and ballots includes any “Monkeys” awarded for “Best Guestbook Entry” or similar. Obviously, this type of award would have to be determined by the committee.

Q. Aren’t we just a bit too old for this sort of thing?

A. You must be kidding! — Just two years from now most of us will be seeing an invitation to join AARP and their danged magazine will be in our mail on a monthly basis. We had better enjoy this reunion before we are too “old” and don’t care about the “Monkey” anymore.

Q. After the awards, will I start having that recurring locker combination dream again?

A. Nah! The 2002 Spank the Monkey Awards are all in good fun. We’re hoping that everyone will take the time to say hello to those they remember as well as to introduce themselves to classmates they never knew during high school. So what if the events look like “Speed Dating Gone Mad?” We hope to see you and your monkey at our 30th — This ought to be quite a show!

Register for our 30th today!

Spank the Monkey Award

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Our thanks for donating 24 bronze See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil Monkey sculptures for the 2002 Spank the Monkey Awards. Also thanks to Alpine Trophy in Littleton for working with us regarding the awards’ engraving.